


A Marriage of Convenience

by HoundstoothStiletto



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Eventual Romance, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:27:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27720697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoundstoothStiletto/pseuds/HoundstoothStiletto
Summary: "One more thing," Admiral Hackett said. "On a personal note. Congratulations on your marriage.""Oh," Shepard froze. She prepared herself for something else. What? She had no idea. Just not that."Thanks Admiral, but I'm not married."Shepard and Garrus both have a bad habit of signing things without reading them.*COMPLETE*
Relationships: Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian
Comments: 36
Kudos: 140





	1. Chapter 1

"One more thing," Admiral Hackett said. "On a personal note. Congratulations on your marriage."

"Oh," Shepard froze. She prepared herself for something else. What? She had no idea. Just not that. 

"Thanks Admiral, but I'm not married," she heard herself say as the rest of her brain caught up. _Her marriage_? 

Hackett started to say something, a few times, but stopped himself. "I see. Hackett out."

"That was weird," she said aloud, not sure what to do. Was something wrong with Hackett? Could he become a liability? She stayed at vid comm. 

"Shepard, you shouldn't say you aren't married, " EDI said, popping up at the EDI terminal. 

"And why is that, EDI?" Good. Something to focus on. 

"You are married, Shepard and he could undo the benefits."

"Is there a very stupid annoying glitch?" Shepard snapped, "I'm not married. Why would I get married?"

What was EDI was talking about? What was Hackett talking about? She wasn't married. It must be a code word no one told her about. 

"You gave me authorization to put the marriage together. You said I could..." EDI's voice stopped to be replaced with a recording of Shepard.

_Do whatever the hell you need to. Use my spectre authorization to expedite it. I don't care how._

Shepard recognized what has been called her pissed off voice. She remembered. The Garrus thing. 

* * *

She found out about the problem it as she walked into the battery for her normal rounds. "I'm not able to calibrate the Thanix," he told EDI. 

Now that they were official and military again, Garrus was having problems logging into the Alliance network. His Hierarchy access needed to go through some Alliance server that couldn't keep up with what it needed to do. He got booted out. It delayed badly. It was a pile of bullshit that should have been resolved before it reached him. 

She remembered anger. Her biggest gun was uncalibrated because her gun man needed to log into two accounts? Because bureaucracy and clauses? 

"How can we fix this?" she asked. Her arms crossed, leaning slightly on her right leg. 

EDI started talking administration. Garrus would need Alliance access. Specifically direct access, not through some Hierarchy access that...was too convoluted and idiotic to waste time listening to.

Shepard interrupted the explanation. "Garrus worked for the Alliance before. On the SR1. Were there problems like that then?" 

"No, but it's okay. Shepard, I'm not letting this baby get anything but the best. I'll figure it out," he answered, stroking his panel like it needed comfort. 

"It's not okay. EDI?" Shepard wondered if she needed comfort, maybe Garrus would treat her like cannon software. 

"Officer Vakarian's access was as an independent contractor, working under spectre authorization," EDI explained. 

Shepard looked at Garrus who shrugged. Of course he wouldn't know.

"And why can't we do that again? That's rhetorical. You know what? Do whatever the hell you need to, EDI..."

* * *

Shepard remembered quite well and it was resolved. EDI kept her more up to date than she wanted and Garrus was so happy to show how fast he could calibrate.

"So what? I gave you authorization to fix Garrus's account, not to marry me off to…" oh no. Who was she supposed to be married to? Garrus? 

"Shepard, you gave me authorization to marry you to Garrus to fix this problem," EDI was getting upset. It was disconcerting.

"I get it. That is a joke," she said, gently mocking EDI's patterns. Hackett got some frazzled info and EDI decided to practice pranks. 

"It is not a joke, Shepard," EDI said vehemently. "The most straightforward way for Garrus to get Alliance access was through Alliance benefits, which are expedited for spouses."

Shepard's omnitool buzzed. EDI sent her a marriage certificate. Oh. Oh god. This is real.

"And you needed a next of kin," EDI reminded. 

Shepard's famous pissed voice paled against the look she gave EDI's interface.


	2. Chapter 2

Garrus was enjoying himself when Shepard entered the battery. What could he do to show off? He already demonstrated the new calibration speed. 

"Shepard, listen to how clear this is," he took off his visor and held it to her. "And see how fast the info is showing up?"

The sound of some music was faint, but there. She tilted her head to see words and numbers flying around. Shepard wished she could appreciate it. She wished she could tease him.

"Thank you for fixing this Shepard. And EDI," he adjusted his visor back into place. 

"Garrus, that's great but we need to talk." She handed him a datapad.

"What is this?" Garrus asked after an eternity of a few seconds. He handed the datapad back. "No offense Shepard, but I'm not married to you."

"Garrus, what did you talk to EDI about to fix your access?" 

"I. Uh. I don't know, Shepard. She took care of everything," he answered. He didn't bring up the topic they should be talking about. This marriage scam someone was doing to them. 

"EDI," Shepard said. Firmly, crisp. An order.

"You, like Shepard, gave me authorization to," EDI said, transferring in a recording of Garrus's own voice.

_Just do what Shepard said. Just leave me out of the paperwork and red tape._

"The easiest way for you to get access to the Alliance network was for you to be married to someone in the Alliance, to get you benefits, to get you direct access," Shepard explained, annoyed and exasperated. Almost the terrifying Shepard voice, but not quite.

"But I didn't..." he trailed off. Not wanting to say it or sure what to say. 

"We've been married a few days," Shepard said, suddenly tired, "EDI did all the paperwork."

"I didn't marry you," he said, obviously thinking of the authorization he saw on the certificate. "I would have remembered."

"One would think," Shepard sighed. "EDI?"

EDI immediately played another recording.

* * *

_"... just leave me out of the paperwork and red tape."_

"Garrus, I highly recommend you read what you are agreeing to. The decision to be legally attached to Shepard - "

"Seriously, EDI," he interrupted, "yes that's fine."

EDI paused. "Please authorize the forms I sent you, then."

"Great, done," Garrus said, "let's do this."

* * *

The recording ended. 

"Is that what I sound like?" he asked. 

"Did you read any of it?" Shepard asked. "And yes, that is what you sound like."

He shook his head, waiting for her to answer the same question. 

"I just sign everything EDI gives me," Shepard said nonchalantly, like what she did was very different. 

"But was there anything else? It can't have been that easy."

"It was not easy," EDI defended herself and then played a superabundance of clips of both of them waving her off and agreeing to whatever. With date stamps. A lot. 

"Thank you, EDI," Shepard said sharply. "We don't need more evidence that we should have noticed."

"Well, this isn't how I imagined marriage," Garrus had his visor off again. Fidgeting. "But we'll make it work, honey."

"Honey?" Shepard must not have heard that right. 

"Sweetie?" He smirked. "My darling SMG?"

"Jerk," she smiled. "SMG?"

"It's a joke. Get it? SMG? Submachine gun?"

She didn't get it, but laughed anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

For someone who had never been to her cabin, Garrus sure got comfortable fast. Shepard looked up at him from her Hierarchy packet. He was sprawled across her couch and coffee table. 

"I don't want to impose, Commander," Garrus had said when she told him to get comfortable. He looked around her cabin, had a staring contest with her hamster, and politely sat with his knees together and feet on the floor. Which lasted less than two minutes. 

How could he be so calm? Well, EDI's report for their marriage was more flattering for him than her. All Shepard saw was a rundown of technicalities and loopholes, heavily padded by hundreds of thousands of words that could be summarized as: Shepard is lonely and her family is dead. Someone will need to claim her corpse so it might as well be Garrus. He could use the perks.

"It makes a lot of sense," he concluded, "the only thing against it is...well. We didn't want to get married."

Shepard agreed, but was just a bit insulted that Garrus said so. Unless he was talking about the benefits part and not the part about her being sad and alone.

This would be more than Garrus having better management of the Thanix. Next shore leave she would get a per diem. A 5% discount from a few places. If she registered. Classes and certifications. 

At least she'd use the spending money at shore leave. 

"Let's talk technicalities," Shepard said. "Until we decide what to do. First, I'll clear things up with Hackett so he doesn't take away your access."

"Right. We wanted to keep it secret as not to disrupt the crew."

"Good idea," Shepard agreed. "That's why I denied being married and why no one knows."

"Moving on with the technicalities," Garrus looked right at her. "What about us?"

"What about us?" Shepard repeated. 

"Well, _honey_ ," he said, "when a turian gets married it's usually because of romance. Not to get into the Alliance network faster to help fight a war for all civilization. I thought it was similar for most humans."

Shepard suddenly didn't like being called 'honey.' Not by him. Or not by him, when it was so obviously insincere. "No, getting into networks to save the galaxy is the main reason humans get married."

"Heh. Shepard, I… I just don't want this to get weird while we get through this. With our friendship."

"It'll be fine. We'll be fine. After I smooth things out, no one will follow up. And if they do, then we're just pretending that we aren't together. Then we won't have to act like we are," Shepard said, happy with her plan. 

"That's a complicated way of saying nothing is changing," Garrus said dryly and turned his attention to his Alliance documents. "So, you seeing anyone?" 

"Are you hitting on me, Vakarian?" She teased, because if she didn't tease that question would hurt.

"Spirits, no!" He sputtered. That hurt too. He quickly tried to fix his reaction. "Not that. Not that you're not a wonderful human woman and anyone who likes you female humans would be lucky to... All I meant was. Uh. I just don't want to cause any problems. Or any more problems."

"There's no one, thanks for the reminder. You go now." Shepard said after the joy of watching him flail faded. EDI's words were bright in her head. _Shepard is lonely._

"Sure. No. No one right now."

To get out this vulnerable awkward place, Garrus pointed something out. "Look, I can get a towel that says my N7 wife can beat up your matriarch grandmother. Just 2500 credits."

"What a deal."


	4. Chapter 4

They agreed not to get a divorce. Or, more appropriate for two people who didn't notice they got married - an annulment. At least not until they didn't need each other's military benefits.

The idea that this war could last longer than their natural lives. That they might want to marry someone else for love… that wasn't brought up. They both knew. 

"I understand the desire for privacy," Admiral Hackett said after Shepard explained. Of course he did. No one knew anything about Hackett. He might have a secret Turian husband too for all anyone knew.

"Thank you Admiral," Shepard said, "and my husband's benefits…?"

"...will be fine," Hackett finished. 

Shepard smiled on her way to her information booker appointment. One down, two to go. After keeping Garrus and the Thanix together, the next most important thing was cauterizing the gossip. 

"Hello, Shepard," Liara greeted. "What can the Shadow Broker do for you?"

"Well, I just wanted to make sure the information about me was… going around without… stuff," Shepard realized Liara might not know. If her system was so damaged a coup slipped by, how could a quiet marriage get noticed? 

Liara smiled uncomfortably. "Yes?"

Shepard continued. "I was afraid there might be misleading gossip. About me." 

Liara nodded encouragingly then softly suggested, "about you and Garrus?"

She hugged Shepard. "I was waiting for you to tell me. I'm so happy for both of you."

"No, don't be happy. That's not." Shepard gently pulled out of the hug. She could tell Liara everything. The idea was too soothing and tempting. "We want to keep it private. No one can know. Can you make sure no one knows?"

"Of course, but when you're ready, we can all use something to celebrate."

"There's nothing to celebrate," Shepard said in a way that might be sad. Even though there was nothing to be sad about either.

Two down one to go. Garrus was responsible for the last part of the marriage cover-up. But instead of quieting down the Hierarchy side, he was in her cabin. That was a surprise. 

"We should get married more often," he greeted and handed her a bottle of champagne. Also a surprise. 

"I made sure everything is in order with the Alliance and Liara won't let this go around," she caught him up. "Did you get the Hierarchy?"

"Yes, actually it was good timiii - ah!" Shepard shot a cork at him; it went hard and bounced off his armor. Shepard didn't acknowledge it so he continued. "Cortez just delivered our wedding presents from Victus, so I was able to call and say thanks but we don't want anyone to know."

Garrus carefully poured his new brandy, keeping a close eye on Shepard after that champagne cork hit him. She was doing lewd things to her bottle of wine, licking up all the drink that spilled over. It would be polite to look away, but he couldn't. There could be more projectiles. 

"What did Steve think this was about? Garrus how many people know - I got strawberries too?" 

"I'm pretty sure Steve Cortez has other things to think about. And if I wanted to keep it a secret _and_ make sure you got your benefits, I had to go right to the top."

"Garrus, this was for you," she murmured to her drink. "I don't need anything...besides a Thanix that shoots where it's aimed - ooohmmm, I'm in love."

Garrus decided to intervene. Her tongue teasing the bottle was one thing. Sex noises were another. (What was she doing to that fruit?) "You don't need to work that hard to sell our secret relationship. No one is listening for marital fraud."

"Sorry, these strawberries are just perfect," she said as if that explained things. It made sense to her. "And EDI is listening."

"Right," Garrus decided to agree, even though he didn't. Some things weren't worth it. 

They finished their interlude and went back to work. After all, there was a war to win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading ❤


	5. Chapter 5

The easiest part of pretending to be secretly in love was the secret part. With a quick damage control on both sides stressing their privacy things seemed to simmer down nicely and went back to normal. Normal friendship. Normally signing whatever EDI wanted. Normal for fighting the reapers? Shepard didn't want to know. Normal drinking? Normal enough.

Shepard walked into the lounge to be greeted by a drunk James Vega and tipsy Steve Cortez. Or, once taking their personalities into account, the other way around.

"Commander! Come! Tequila!"

Simple enough to do. Normal enough to do when Thessia falls to the Reapers and Cerberus comes running to kick them while they're down. Theoretically. 

She was presented with a generous tequila serving and realized they weren't giving her anything else to go with it. No salt, no lime, no chaser. Unacceptable. Shepard swallowed the drink at once and pushed her cup back to them. "Make me a margarita."

The two men played a brief game of chicken before James stood up. While pulling out various ingredients, he said "the primarch is a good guy. Adrian Victus might make mistakes, but he owns them."

Yes that's true, Shepard thought, watching James make sugar water. She guessed no one wanted to think about Thessia. Going back to the Hierarchy's bomb disaster felt quaint. 

"It's not sugar water, you need to make simple syrup, Vega," Cortez directed and then turned to Shepard, ignoring a confused James Vega."Yeah, it was nice to hear from Primarch Victus. Did you get the present from Garrus yet?" 

Shepard lost count of how many times someone brought up Garrus to her and she didn't know what to say. She never had to watch what she said about him before. The marriage did change a very small thing after all. 

"From the primarch?" Steve continued. He generously elaborated. "Garrus took it up to your cabin. He said it was a huge thanks for what you did for his son. Literally huge."

"It was as big as me," James added, doing something that let out a lime aroma.

"I haven't seen it yet," Shepard said carefully, not sure if she should drink the cocktail Vega just put in front of her. No, she should drink it. He looked so proud.

Shepard walked in a sober manner through her cabin when she saw Garrus. On her bed. Was this only the second time she was surprised to see him there? If he looked comfortable on her couch...

"Hey," he greeted like he had always been there. Like she walked into his space. 

"Hi," she said carefully, "Where's my present from the Primarch of Palaven? For helping his son die with dignity and not destroying his career?"

"Look Shepard, I was very clear we didn't want our 'relationship' known," Garrus said, a bit bashful. He sat up as if he just realized he had been lounging on Commander Shepard's bed like it was his own. On a huge pile of raw cotton. "It had already been sent. And besides. this is the Elkoss Combine Turian Asari pillow."

As if that meant something, besides that it probably wasn't literally just a lump of cotton. Probably. 

"This pillow is more comfortable than anything any Turian would ever sleep on. Even on Palaven. _The_ Elkoss Combine. Shepard? I never thought I would imagine how great these are...and your bed is the only place big enough for it. It doesn't fit in my bunk."

"So it's good for your moral and well-being," she said. Sarcastically, but not sober enough to come through. 

"And my back," he added, cautiously settling back down. 

Sharing a bed was another change, but it wasn't too weird. Even if the official reason was the amazing pillow, they both remembered EDI's report. 

_Shepard is lonely. Shepard's wellbeing would increase an estimated 72.083% with regular companionship._

EDI was right. It was good to not be alone. Even if her company was a turian snoring happily and taking up most of the bed. She was calmer - still astonishingly stressed - but calmer was calmer. And Garrus got a pillow to love as much as his gun. It was good for him. He was in a better mood, more alert, and took longer to burn out. 

The pros outweighed the cons to the point where Shepard could hardly think of a reason why not to be married. Until she remembered. He didn't want to marry her. They didn't want to be married to each other. And then she was lonely again. 

At least shore leave was coming. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading ❤


	6. Chapter 6

Shore leave did not get off to a good start. 

Shepard did not get to see Joker's face when he saw how much wasabi she could take at once. Did not find the bolero she was going to wear with her dress. Did not get to waste all her Hierarchy per diem on roulette. Did not get to poach a staff analyst.

But when she saw her clone let go, Shepard did get to see what she would look like if she stopped fighting so hard to stay alive and just let herself plummet to death. 

And her husband was attending to his expensive pillow.

"Did they do any damage?" She teased, but he was too invested to notice. 

"It seems ok," Garrus answered seriously, running _another_ omnitool scan, "It doesn't look like your clone did any damage when she trashed your cabin. I'm getting it decontaminated just in case. Probably time to do that anyway."

"Decontamination? You doing something to that pillow when I'm not around Vakarian?" He noticed the teasing this time. It was successful. (Wasn't it?) The way Garrus looked at her... she needed to clench and breath to control the way it felt. Smouldered. The asshole. Teasing her right back.

"No," he eventually chuckled. "I'll pick it up and get it back before we get back. Don't worry."

"I'll try not to." Teasing successful. "Get back fast and help me prepare for this party."

There was still. Were still. So many people to see. To talk to. But maybe it was okay that she lost so much time on shore leave. Instead of scattering herself all over, people coming to her, for once. For a big party before the galaxy is destroyed. 

Kasumi found her bolero jacket, but it hindered her dancing moves. Shepard did her wasabi party trick, which Joker did cringe at while Tali pretended to be impressed. There were snacks. Shootings. Jack's silly squawk when hugged. It was a good party. 

And after, when everyone was looking for space to lie down and sleep, Shepard kicked Javik out of bed. Literally. The first time had been verbal, the second time a push. And he was coming back again? 

"Jesusfuck. Javik," she hissed. Maybe Wrex could help. Pick Javik up and take him to some part of the apartment where he couldn't find his way back.

"Oh. You were expecting Javik?" Garrus softly replied, his weight lifting from the bed. 

"No, no more Javik here."

"He couldn't do it for you, huh?" 

"No, he didn't..." she whispered back. What an opening. How could she answer? Say something sexy. Something about if he's up for the challenge. If he could elaborate. Or...

"What're you doing here?" 

"Well. Uh. You may have noticed. This is a big apartment, but there aren't that many places to sleep."

She touched him, a gentle tug. _Lie down_ , her tug said. He did and she rolled right into his armor. She stayed against him. If he noticed, he didn't mind. In fact. Could she? Yes, she could. _Time to seduce_ , she thought and slowly pushed her leg over his. Garrus's hand came down to her hip. Hard armored fingers pushing in. 

"IN MY CYCLE...we didn't…" a voice came. Very loudly. Very close. 

Garrus stilled. Shepard decided to wait for Javik to shut up. Then she'd make her move. Until then, she pressed against Garrus. His cold armor was nice against her alcohol heated face.

She woke up, a bit cold. _Time to warm up_. She started to touch and feel where he was. 

"What are you doing?" Garrus asked firmly. Unpleasantly. 

"I'm from STG," a Salarian voice replied, "I'm delivering data from Dr. Mordin Solus, I…"

"Get out."

She felt Garrus leave the bed to escort their visitor out. _Mordin?_ She heard EDI say Private Khaluah was authorized. She didn't hear Garrus come back to bed. 

When she woke up again, it was to Mordin singing, Garrus stretching, and James Vega screaming about eggs. 

It was a good shore leave after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading. Just one or two chapters left. ❤


	7. Chapter 7

"Come back alive," he ordered. This was the end of the war. Everyone felt it.

"I guess I could tolerate a little insubordination." Shepard squeezed his hand back, and hopefully he felt as much of it as he could through two gauntlets. She couldn't handle how much emotion she heard in his voice. She felt it. Somewhere deep behind her ribs."Worried about your perks?" 

"I don't care about that," he almost snapped, but softened before he finished. "I care about you."

"I'll come back alive. Otherwise you might divorce me and let the Alliance do whatever they want…" it was a bad joke that went nowhere and she regretted it. Garrus didn't like it. 

"You didn't read the divorce papers I gave you? I'll always be there for you, even after I file. It was the first addendum."

Shepard was absolutely ruining this heartfelt goodbye. So, it wouldn't be a goodbye. 

"I'll see you later, Garrus," she kissed him. She didn't press hard enough for his mouth plates to leave an imprint, but they did. She felt them through the rest of the battle. The rest of war. 

She felt them when every other part of her hurt so much she would have died without them. She felt them through mourning and reunions. Through recovery and funerals and when the ruins of the citadel slowly built back up.

She felt them when he took her to lunch (a picnic on the nicest rubble around). He served her a divorce - get this out of the way, it's been long coming.

She felt their kiss even after she signed off without reading a thing; she trusted him. And even when she saw the absolute relief and joy that the marriage was over. 

She smiled, "the most successful sham marriage ever."

Garrus agreed. "It's finally over and we got away with it."

She kept her smile, her lips as wide as possible, so the kiss could dissolve and fall off. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, the next chapter will be soon❤


	8. Chapter 8

"Let's celebrate," the message said. He sent her the final documents and his new address. So he shouldn't have been surprised she was there. 

"Shepard!" She startled him. A pop and she ducked a champagne cork. "Ah, hey," he greeted pouring wine into a pint glass, fuzz spilling onto his hands. " I couldn't find the one you liked, this was the closest thing they had."

She accepted her cup of...strawberry flavored sparkling wine.

"I'm sure it's delicious," she laughed.

"That's not what the guy said when I bought it," he retorted while programming an oven? Something. He shooed her away. "Be comfortable, enjoy the view."

The windows were far too small to enjoy. And it looked like there was a space hamster on his desk in the corner. She tentatively sat on a loveseat, assessing the firmness before relaxing. 

He sat next to her with his drink. Sat very next to her and introduced his new friend. "That's Kalross."

"I'm sure Hamish would love to meet them," she said. 

"Heh, yeah," he was distracted. Looking around like his little studio needed to be inventoried. "Uh, the food will be ready soon, you look nice, did you hear they found the krogan statue?"

He was nervous. It would be cute except he was so very nervous. It couldn't be healthy. 

"Relax, we're celebrating, " she reminded him. He was jittery. Shaky. He started to talk so many times but instead just continued to reassess his home. As if he was expecting marauders. This was not healthy. 

"It's okay," she touched his face to steady him before dropping her hand to his shoulder. Everything was fine. This was exactly how it was planned. Nothing between them changed after they got married. Not really. Nothing would change now.

"Garrus, it's okay," she repeated and he heard her this time. "I know this is weird. But I think I can handle being friends with the ex if you can."

Garrus nodded and took a generous swig of his drink.

I don't want you to be uncomfortable," she added. 

"No. I'm not uncomfortable. Just nervous," he admitted, which alone seemed to help his nerves.

"I noticed."

"And I want to say that I'm very happy that this ridiculous marriage is over," he said almost steadily.

"I noticed," she repeated, but the tone was very different.

"Now we can go back to where our relationship was before," Garrus continued. Shepard nodded. 

"May I?" He asked.

"Yes,"Shepard had no idea what he was asking. But she trusted him. Even when he took her drink away. And when he held her shoulders and slowly moved down to her hands with a short squeeze. 

She was so used to his armor. She looked at his thin talons, very aware he was waiting for her. 

"Yes," she agreed again. He moved to hold her waist, turning her just enough that she had to face him. 

"Yes," she whispered. The time between their breaths lasted so long. She wondered if he didn't hear her, but then he pulled her into his lap so she was facing him. He heard. 

She would need to adjust if they were going to stay like this long. Her legs would get stiff.

"This is where our relationship was before? Can't say I remember this," A little adjustment and she could grind on his thigh. She didn't.

"Well, no, but I thought...we were… almost...," his nervousness started to rise again, "I'm so sorry Shepard. I misinterpreted, I thought -"

"You thought right," she said before leaning in to kiss him. And kiss him until he calmed down. She felt him relax before he tensed again. The right way this time. 

A little shift and _there_. She pushed into his lap, a seam or wrinkle in his pants just right next to her clit. Perfect. 

He moved to press his forehead to hers. "Let me make sure the food will stay warm...unless I'm misinterpreting this?"

"I don't think even you can be this dense, Vakarian," she answered. But, just in case he was, "I want to have sex. With you. Now."

"I want that too, Shepard."

A few minutes later, Shepard giggled from embarrassment and joy. "I'm usually not that easy."

Garrus pushed her shirt off. "Neither am I. Next time let's keep the foreplay under a year."

Shepard squirmed off the rest of her clothes, "deal."

Naked and unhindered, she was able to wrap herself around him "What's next?"

"Something that's just for us. Something that we know about. You deserve romance," he said while playing with her hair. He could make a ball. 

"Usually, humans don't divorce their spouses to romance them," she started to feel around for his erogenous areas. He had to have them. 

"Usually," he grabbed her wrist, "turians don't romance someone unless there aren't any issues like a conflict of... Shepard!"

She released her teeth from the base of his neck. "I'm listening. You don't want us to be tainted by war and login accounts."

He pushed her down and rolled over on top of her. "Next time we'll do it right?"

She looked him straight in the eye. "This time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbank you all so much for reading, commenting, enjoying, and giving kudos. Whichever combination of those things you did.


End file.
